As we head into the Oscars, “Past Lives” is my pick for Best Picture—even though it’s unlikely to win. Months after watching it, the film still lingers in my mind. It’s the kind of movie that doesn’t just end when the credits roll. It stays with you, creeping into quiet moments of reflection, making you think about the choices you’ve made, the paths you didn’t take, and the people who once meant everything but are now just memories.
Directed by Celine Song in her feature debut, “Past Lives” is a delicate, deeply personal story that plays out like a three-act play—fitting, given her background as a playwright. The film follows childhood friends Nora (Greta Lee) and Hae Sung (Teo Yoo), who share a close bond in South Korea before circumstances pull them apart. Years later, with Nora now living in New York, they reconnect through Facebook and video calls, rekindling something that was never fully realized. But life moves forward, and in the film’s final act, Hae Sung visits Nora in person, now that she’s married to Arthur (John Magaro), forcing all three to confront what their relationships truly mean.
One of the film’s central ideas is the Korean concept of in-yeon, the belief that people are connected across lifetimes through fate. According to the idea, even something as small as brushing past a stranger on the street means that you had a connection in a past life. A deeper relationship—especially one like Nora and Hae Sung’s—suggests that their souls have been tied together for lifetimes before this one. The film doesn’t try to make a grand statement about whether fate dictates our lives, but it does ask a quiet, heartbreaking question: even if two people are destined to be connected, does that mean they’re destined to be together?
From its very first shot, “Past Lives” presents itself as a film that understands the quiet, unspoken complexities of relationships. We open on Nora, Hae Sung, and Arthur sitting at a bar, framed in a way that invites curiosity. We hear unseen onlookers attempting to decipher the nature of their relationship. Is it a married couple and a brother? Two exes with a third wheel? What’s the dynamic? That question, posed by these nameless observers, is the very question “Past Lives” spends the next two hours answering.
While “Past Lives” is often framed as a story about the one that got away, it’s equally a story about identity. Hae Sung isn’t just a former childhood love—he represents the Korea that Nora left behind. His presence forces her to reckon with the fact that she has changed. She no longer speaks Korean as fluidly as she once did. She has adopted a new name, a new language, a new way of existing in the world. And yet, there is something about Hae Sung’s presence that reawakens that part of her, reminding her of the version of herself that could have been. It’s in the way she switches seamlessly between Korean and English depending on who she’s talking to. It’s in how she tries to explain Arthur to Hae Sung, and vice versa—never quite able to bridge the two worlds completely. The film doesn’t just ask “what if” about love, but also about identity. What if she had stayed? Would she still be her?
Greta Lee delivers a stunning, career-defining performance. She says so much with just her expressions—her reactions to Hae Sung’s Facebook messages and their Skype calls are so authentic, so raw, that you feel like you’re watching someone experience these emotions in real time. The way her face shifts ever so slightly when Hae Sung first reappears in her life tells us everything before she even speaks. It’s a restrained, deeply internal performance, one that perfectly captures the feeling of reconnecting with a past that never truly left you.
Teo Yoo, already well known in the Korean drama and film space (“Decision to Leave,” “Vertigo”), brings an understated power to Hae Sung. He’s not playing the kind of grand romantic lead we often see in Korean dramas, but something more grounded—a man quietly struggling with his emotions, navigating the push and pull of nostalgia and reality. His performance is deeply restrained, yet every pause, every glance carries meaning. When he and Nora finally meet again in New York, it’s not just their words that hold weight, but the unspoken history between them.
John Magaro, meanwhile, delivers what might be one of the most quietly heartbreaking performances of the year. His Arthur is the very embodiment of the modern, self-aware husband—supportive, understanding, and deeply in love. But he is also human. He knows he is competing with something intangible, something he can never fully understand. And yet, he never once lets that insecurity turn into resentment. The way Magaro allows Arthur’s emotions to simmer just below the surface, never fully breaking, never demanding more than what Nora can give, is a masterclass in restraint.
And then there’s the final scene—the one that cements “Past Lives” as one of the most profound films of the year. After an evening spent wandering the city together, Hae Sung and Nora stand on the sidewalk, and he finally asks the question they’ve both been avoiding: “What if we had met again sooner?” The answer doesn’t come in a dramatic monologue or a sweeping romantic gesture. Instead, it’s in the silence, the way their eyes lock, the way their bodies hesitate before finally parting ways. Hae Sung walks away, and Nora watches until he disappears, holding back tears.
When she turns around, Arthur is waiting. And what does he do? He doesn’t interrogate her. He doesn’t demand answers. He simply holds her. It’s one of the most romantic moments in recent film history, made all the more powerful by the fact that most people watching the movie have likely spent two hours rooting for a different ending. But “Past Lives” isn’t about giving us what we want—it’s about telling the truth. Love is complicated. Relationships are messy. And there is no one-size-fits-all answer.
More than anything, “Past Lives” is a film about the power of connection. It understands that love isn’t always wrapped up in a neat bow, that it comes in different forms, and that sometimes, there’s room for all of it in our lives. Some loves are meant to last forever, while others live in the what-ifs. And that’s okay.
It’s no exaggeration to say this was my favorite film of 2023. Celine Song has established herself as an extraordinary storyteller, seamlessly blending themes of love, loss, and identity in a way that feels deeply personal yet universal. I can’t wait to see what she does next. And as for Greta Lee and Teo Yoo? If there’s any justice, this is just the beginning of their ascent to international stardom.
Final verdict: 5 out of 5 stars. A deeply moving, masterfully crafted debut that cements Song, Lee, Magaro and Yoo as talents to watch.